1/21/21 The Chatterbox
Betty Kaiser
I had a birthday last week and by all standards, I am now officially old. Living 82 years will give you that reputation. I have previously written nostalgic birthday columns but never one during a pandemic of bad news—especially one that doesn’t include friends, parties, hugging, laughter and a birthday cake!
In 2009 I wrote about the excitement of childhood birthdays. My favorite memories are the ones in elementary school. They are sprinkled with fairy dust. Mother braided my hair and I carefully chose the dress that I wore to school. Later in the day, mom brought homemade cupcakes and Kool-Aid for the class to enjoy. It was a tradition.
That weekend, my best friends came to my house for a party. Dressed in our frilly party dresses and Mary Jane shoes, we played games and I opened my gifts. Some of my favorites were paper dolls, coloring books, jump ropes, baby dolls and jacks.
Then, mother brought out her delicious buttermilk cake, layered and spread with a fluffy boiled frosting that was topped with coconut. Ablaze with candles, I closed my eyes and made a wish. Then, the candles were blown out, the cake cut and served with giggles, ice cream and lemonade.
Each departing guest was given a party favor and this birthday girl stored enough happy memories in my heart to last a lifetime. Birthday celebrations changed as I got older but I carried out similar celebrations with my children for their memory bank.
My favorite, “I can’t believe I’m an old lady” birthday story happened when I turned 65. That day I left the Sentinel office to go to lunch at Taco Bell. After I ordered, the clerk leaned over the counter, smiled and said, “Are you eligible for a senior discount?”
Yikes! Was it that obvious that I was “older”? Evidently it was and I graciously owned up to being a senior and enjoyed my free diet Pepsi.
Thanks to the Covid-19 Pandemic, this year’s birthday story is pretty boring. There were no luncheons or parties to attend and report on. However, the mailbox overflowed with cards, the phone rang with good wishes and there were lots of texts to be answered. It was all good.
Coincidentally, there were several emails bluntly reminding me that at my age, I am in a very special age group—a Senager (aka a senior teenager) because I have everything that I wanted as a teenage…. just 60 years later. Think about it and then laugh.
One of my recent emails was a lighthearted commentary on the year 2020. It was a horrible year like none of us have ever known—even the elderly like me. We all had new and constantly changing rules to abide by thanks to the awful Covid-19 virus. And sometimes we thought we were going to cry or go crazy. Right?
Well, I finally calmed down, got enough toilet paper and settled into the “masks are going to save us” mind set. Not everyone was happy. Our lifestyle changed so abruptly that it was depressing. Some were really grouchy! Then, this New Year’s email arrived. Read the comments below, laugh and you’ll know we’re all in this together:
* The dumbest thing I ever bought was a 2020 planner.
* Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask & ask for money.
*The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house & their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors!
*This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her dog. It was obvious she thought her dog understood her. I came into my house & told my cat. We laughed a lot.
* Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.
* Does anyone know if we can take showers yet or should we just keep washing our hands?
* This virus has done what no woman has been able to do. Cancel sports, shut down all bars & keep men at home!
* I never thought the comment, “I wouldn’t touch him/her with a 6-foot pole” would become a national policy, but here we are!
* I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.
* I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to the Backyard. I’m getting tired of the Living Room.
Now you know that you’re not alone. Laugh and the world laughs with you! Stay well, wear your masks, keep social distancing and please…let me know when you find the Covid-19 vaccine injections.
Remember—times have been tough before. This too, shall pass,,, so keep looking up. God help us all!
P.S. Happy Birthday to my fellow Capricorns!
Contact Betty Kaiser’s Chatterbox @ bchatty@bettykaiser.com
